Good morning there!
Praying your Monday turns out to be lovely. Mondays are so hard, I know. But I hope it will at least be bearable. HEY, HEY. WE CAN DO IT.
Tomorrow is Tuesday! It is also Valentine’s Day. *ceremonious barfing* It definitely felt appropriate that I should take some time to talk about my seemingly permanent single-Pringle status.
—No, no, I’m mostly content… The “mostly” part is what I want to talk about I guess. I guess I should just jump right into it. Ahem.
I feel that every once in awhile I have to renew my heart-wish to “wait until the appropriate time” for this whole love-thing.
And genuinely, the waiting part is not the whole problem. It’s the not knowing? It’s the uncertainty of what happens in the meantime. My lack of control over the situation makes the INFJ-perfectionist side of me so unhappy. But then the INFP-idealism bit of me kicks in and I remember why this was important to me in the first place.
I have the same mental struggles we all do, my friend. And I am honestly rather prone to crushes. Specifically the “oh my gosh he’s the one I have to go to Pinterest and plan the wedding right nowwww” sort. I mean, flights of fancy are kind of my thing, so it really isn’t a surprise.
The truth is, my dreams fall so short of God’s dreams for me. And I don’t want to go planning out my whole life for Him — believe me, I try to — but this guy knows what He’s doing.
Friends. It is so, so easy to get our minds caught up in what we do not yet have. This isn’t even confined just to seeking a significant other. There’s enough else to keep us stressed out about our unsure futures — college, money, jobs, cars, bills, annoying commercials that convince you your life will not be complete until you own a flip-a-zoo. Or whatever…
I have literally sat awake many a night just contemplating how much I have absolutely no idea what’s going to happen next.
And I get all caught up in pipe-dreams and fairytales. I worry too much about what I do not yet have. I stir up hopes and desires in myself that are not yet meant to be stirred up. And I find myself feeling so unsatisfied with the life and opportunities that I already have.
And I miss out on so much because of it.
Crushes come in all forms. An appealing this-or-that comes along and our mind gets caught up in an idealistic fantasy that will probably never come true. (And even if it does come true what good does dwelling on it until you’re unhappy do?)
I am a single Pringle and I don’t have any clue at all what lies ahead of me. I am at the very beginning of the story.
What I know is that God started a good work in me and He will be faithful to finish it. I have so many beautiful opportunities and relationships and friends and books to read and thoughts to think and raindrops to catch on my tongue. I have a cat to pet and siblings to care for and brand new concepts to learn and tea to sip delicately. I have a God to take refuge in and a life that is made very valid and beautiful just by the fact that He has breathed me into existence, loved me, and called me His own.
I am so grateful for the now.
And I think I want to live here for awhile.
“Young women of Jerusalem, I charge you by the gazelles and the wild does of the field: do not stir up or awaken love until the appropriate time.”
Song of Solomon 2:7
“I am sure of this, that He who started a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus. “
“Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.”